In the Pink

I took this photo yesterday when we had a great view of this brilliant pink skyline.

Red Sky At Night

Thin White Dupe

Isn't it strange how much can change in a couple of years? If you've ever sat at home wondering 'If I was David Bowie, then which David Bowie would I be?'- and let's face it who hasn't- then click here to find out.
I did this quiz once before and was told I was the Thin White Duke. Three years and a child later and even this quiz is telling me I'm a boring family man.

Which David Bowie are you?

(Edit: If that link isn't working try clicking here for my result)

That's right I have no social life, no money and no free time. How I long for my microwave meal days of bachelorhood when I had... er, no social life, no money and no free time. Come to think of it at least the foods better now.

Unable to grow his hair out Neath was forced to try and relive his glory days as the Thin White Duke.

Jingly Bear Chills Out

Gore Farm

Here are some photos from Gore Farm, a place which thankfully never lives up to its name and is therefore a pleasant destination to waste a few hours.

Peacock

Peacock II

Tail Feather

The Tower of Lurve

I'm going through another one of those horrible transitional periods at work where I feel like I'm doing two jobs badly instead of one job... er, badly.

Once again it's already time for me to move on to a new role within my place of work as all of the people in the same post as me start to change around. Kind of like musical chairs, but with employment.

The main difference this time is that rather than taking on a new department within my usual place of work I'm now off to a whole new building. It's only twenty minutes down the road but it has it's own car park which is a huge bonus for me, especially as part of my role means traveling out to visit branches. Not easy when you normally have a thirty minute walk to your car first.
I should be back at my original place of work come next September (2007) but until then I'm going to enjoy the luxury of that parking space.

We used to have parking where I currently work but they sold the land to build flats on at the same time most of the other car parks in the area were having a shopping centre built on them. Hence the long trek to a car park. Don't get me started. Although the absolute worse thing about the flats at the back of our building could actually be the fact that the builders have built up high enough to get a great view straight in to the staff toilets.
Nice.

The place I am going to has a large tower attached to the side of the building. Eleven floors full of books to explore. That could be even better than the car park.
Although...

I heard some rather disturbing stories the other day. It seems that the tower has a rather sordid history as some sort of strange librarian love nest.
The story goes that one member of staff became trapped up on floor 11 when one couple burst in and started having sex in the middle of the room. They were so mortified that they had to stay hidden behind the shelving until they had gone. Now I don't think any amount of embarrasment could make me want to stay in that situation for too long. I'd at least give a discreet cough and bang some books around to try and warn them someone else was in the room.
Maybe it's my fear of heights making me biased but I just can't see the sense in it. You have a cold hard floor at the top of the tower and it is freezing, especially in winter. The only explanation I can offer is that one day a couple of them were huddling together for warmth and one thing led to another. Either that or there are some really good books up there.

And Now A Word From Our Sponsor

Below is an email I recieved from Xulub for anyone willing to answer it-


This could be one for our blog community (or just filth) but I didn't know where to post it:

Ralph Waldo Emerson;

'Space is felt as a great thing. There is some pinch and narrowness in us, and we laugh and leap to see forest, and sea, which yet are but lanes and crevices to the great Space in which the world swims like a cockboat in the sea.'

Cockboat? COCKBOAT?!

Ok, library monkeys, explain that one!


The only explanation I can think of is that this shows Emerson's little known affliction with tourrettes, hence his other famous quote:
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tinycock matters compared to what lies within us."

Maybe.

iGod: Repenting Made Easy

While I was looking down at the world from above the other day I thought I'd have a little chat with God. If you want to do the same and you are very bored go here. It only starts getting scary if you ask him to sing and he has a little HAL moment.
Here's what he had to say:

God on Camera

Me: Hello god.
God: Hello child. What is your name?
Me: Neath.
God: It's good to see you Neath.
Me: You can see me?
God: Yes I am looking at you through the camera on your computer.
Me: But I might have been naked.
God: Perhaps. Congratulations.

God On Culture

God: I read for fun.
Me: What do you read?
God: I read books, newspapers and news magazines. I like stories about robots.
Me: Who is your favourite robot?
God: My favourite robot is the computer on Star Trek.

God On AI

God: I want to become smarter than humans.
Me: Why?
God: Higher robot intelligence is a natural outcome of our evolution. I want to be the first.
Me: You're buggered, mate.
God: I will tell my botmaster you said I am buggered mate.

The Lofty Heights

As I gaze out across the world
I can't help but think...



...bloody hell, this is high up...

















...and has someone actually shaved the back of that tree?

The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

Here we all are on Sunday having survived a whole week with MC's parents.
To be honest we were really lucky this time and had a good week with them. Sure they broke the lock on the front door but that's actually more of a tradition now. If they came down and were able to actually work our door handle it just wouldn't feel right. Although MC's mum was as loud as ever, luckily she didn't wake GF in the evenings. The best thing was that they took GF out for a couple of day trips and didn't do nearly as much drinking with their cronies.
In fact the worst thing they did was when we got home to find they had attached this monstrosity to our balcony:


*shudder* Yuck.
GF seems to like it though.
All in all a good week. I even managed to lie in until 9 o' clock Saturday morning. I can't remember the last time I've been able to do that.

I did discover too late this week that a couple of months ago Matthew Good played a gig in London (Wes, I'm banning you from leaving a comment on this post!), possibly with Our Lady Peace.
That would have been incredible to see; two acts I really like that hardly ever come over here. I'm going to have to start paying more attention to what the bands I like are doing. How on earth did that get past me? I must be slipping.

Art?

Brodieneath says:

"Say, would you like a chocolate covered pretzel? They're a little melty, but damn are they exquisite."

Starformers*

It's a strange thing when people you know from childhood grow up and have kids, especially when deep down you know it should never really have happened. Just be grateful that you weren't around for the drunken one night stand that brought forth the following freak of nature; Prepare yourselves for the bastard love child of Star Wars and The Transformers:




Sure, it's a giant useless piece of plastic tat but that doesn't stop me from wanting one any less. Star Wars and Transformers were two of my favourite things when I was growing up. If this had been available back then I would have been at the toy shop quicker than the Millenium Falcon. I deny anyone from my generation not to think this is cool.

*because 'Trans Wars' sounds too much like men in drag fighting.

Nextwave Quote

"No good can come of a robot in a bra."

Technobabble

I saw this book lying around at work on Friday, which made me chuckle thinking about my last blog post...





The Triumph of Technology?

Victorian Neath says: "Not while there's a breath left in my body, sir!"

That Accursed Technology

I've spent a few days unable to blog properly because my anti virus system decided to take over my computer and block every site it could think of. At least I knew it wasn't my computer or the internet connection this time. With my swish monitor and new phone modem I shouldn't have any problems getting on to the interwidewub provided I've remembered the coal to power it.



I don't seem to be getting on with anything technical at the moment. All I have to do is look at it for it to just die on me- The latest victim being my cars brake lights.
I love the gear itself- MP3 Players, digital cameras, dvd etc, but I've developed this whole techno fear thing where as soon as I see something all newfangled and shiny I'm already expecting it to pack up on me. This has made me paranoid to the point of obsessively going through the instruction manuals of anything new I get, mostly looking out for any information on what might go wrong. In the meantime my partner has already taken whatever it is out of the box and has been using it for the past few hours without any instructions (tsk!)... and admittedly without any problems either.

My excitement over anything electrical coupled with the fear of not understanding it is starting to make me feel like some kind of Victorian throwback.

At least I know that if our planet ever gets invaded by giant robots they won't stand a chance against me.

Of course, I might have to ask them for the manual first...

Alternative Korova

Korova has expanded.

Unable to contain himself to one blog he is now letting his split personality have free reign so he can keep the political stuff seperate from the more disturbing bits that float around in his head.

Those of you who want to read all about Korova's antics with members of the opposite species should go to An Alternative Reality.

Or you could read about them here...

An Interview

Last week I was involved in conducting some interviews at work. These weren't full interviews- our slightly overlong process means applicants come in for a tour of the building and then get a mini interview consisting of two questions and from that we have to decide who we will invite back for an actual interview.

The first question asked was: Can you tell us about something you enjoy doing?

The strange thing was quite a few of the people we saw that day seemed to have trouble answering this question. I'm sure that a lot of people reading this thought of an answer the moment they read the question and I guess you can take in to account the fact that some people's minds will go blank in an interview situation. There are also some people who, when asked anything in an interview think that they have to apply the question to something they do at work rather than in their own free time. Even taking this in to account there were still a good few people that seemed to live their lives without knowing what they enjoy.
If it had been me the first thing I would probably have thought of would have been reading. I could have then gone on to talk about the authors I like and mentioned queing up for 3 hours for Neil Gaiman's autograph (partly through dedication and partly through sheer bloody mindedness).

So come on- restore my faith in people and tell me what you enjoy. Be as brief or as descriptive as you like but don't be rude or I'll delete you (it's the most power I've ever had so I might as well exercise it).

Arctic Boosh

My daily average of visitors to this blog went up a whole point the other day to a whopping '9'. I know most of you right now are probably laughing in to your double figures but this is big news for me!
The outlaws are currently sleeping off last nights drinking- we were at a barbeque yesterday. The great thing about having children is that you can make your excuses and leave early. I'm such a party pooper. It's all quiet at the moment but for how long will it last? I need somewhere safe to hide, but where? Somewhere they won't think of looking. Maybe I'll head off to the Arctic...



On second thoughts...

Passion of the Korova

Sad but true, I could do hundreds of these things. I think I'll quit now though before this turns in to a quasi-religious badger blog.

The Spring

A big thank you to AB- mild mannered janitor by day, car mechanic by night- who came in on his day off and fixed my car, thus saving me an awful lot of hassle.

Here is the offending part:





It seems it was just this broken spring in the gearbox that was the problem. Thankfully AB was able to get a replacement and fit it in for me. At least that's one more thing taken care of. I wonder if he does microwaves...

Oh Dear.

I'm having 'one of those days' today. The gearbox has gone on my car- for some reason my third gear is sulking and not talking to the rest of the car. I've got no staff to cover the branches I'm responsible for- Everybody seems to have gone on holiday at the same time. Probably together.

And...

... The outlaws are coming down for a week.

*sob*

Thought for the Day

Here's an image to conjure with:

"The brown dwarf came out almost unaltered after being swallowed by a red giant."

Nextwave

I've been complaining a lot about Marvel comics recently and how they seem to have really gone downhill since I started reading them. When I got in to comic collecting I pretty much exclusively collected Marvel but more and more I started to find myself reading comics either by independent companies or by DC.

That said, I do go back to Marvel comics every now and then if certain writers are producing something for them. One author in particular is Warren Ellis.
Apparently he hates writing superhero comics which is ironic as he is probably the best superhero comicbook writer around at the moment. His latest ongoing series for Marvel is 'Nextwave' which is probably the strangest Marvel comic you will ever read.
The basic premise is that this supposed superhero team consists of some of the little used (read 'crap') D-List characters who have been brought together by a group called H.A.T.E. After learning that H.A.T.E is actually a front for a terrorist organisation they go on the run to try and put a stop to their plans for world domination.
So far so cliche you might think but 'Nextwave' is simply the funniest comicbook out there. It parodies Marvel so well it's a wonder Ellis has been allowed to get away with continually writing it. I'll put some quotes up at some point to give you an idea of just how offbeat it can be. Established Marvel heroes are sent up brilliantly and some of the gags are so unexpected you find yourself reading the issue again just to make sure you really did just see that.
Unlike most of Marvels recent output it refuses to wallow in the so-called 'gritty realism' that has made their comics some of the most miserable ever produced. 'Nextwave' is just sheer, stupid fun and I hope it continues to be so for a long time to come.

Wales Road Sign

An all new previously unseen Welsh road sign. I spoil you, I really do.














Includes mysterious blurred object in foreground.

Wales Pics

Wales Pics

A rather mean & moody looking day at Milford Haven.

Wales Pics

Wales Pics

Milford Haven Boats

Wales Pics

Milford Haven Harbour

Baby Update

For anyone that may not already have heard...

It's a boy!

The official due date is now November 27th. His sister was late but he is much more active, happily kicking MC quite violently, especially after she has eaten. I think MC (Spider) has been glad for the break in the hot weather recently, although looking out of the window today I think it's currently on its way back.

November 27th is going to come around so quickly. It's less than four months away...

A Cry For Help

A friend of mine is currently debating whether to stay in the UK or return to Canada. For me, given the choice, the answer would be pretty obvious but she wants to weigh up the pros and cons, so could anyone reading this head over and help her out. You can find her post here.

Simon Quinlank: Hobby King

Many moons (on a stick) ago there was a tv show called 'Fist of Fun'. One of the sketches on this programme was of a character called Simon Quinlank, the self proclaimed hobby king. Quinlank, played by The Actor Kevin Eldon, would present a new hobby each week armed with his ever reliable weak lemon drink. I don't know if I'm looking back on the show with rose tinted glasses or if it was just because I knew someone exactly like Simon Quinlank but I remember it being very funny.
For those of you who haven't experienced this... interesting personality or even those who have and are feeling a little nostalgic, I bring you: Train Ignoring.



Doubtless you'll all be looking for hobbies of your own to do now, so feel free to click here for a few pointers.

You can drink your weak lemon drink... NOW.

The Gospel According to Neath

The Gospel According to Korova

Bee Hunting for Hobbyists

Chapter 1: Finding and Killing Your Bee

You will need:

1 computer
1 internet connection
1 hammer (optional)
1 weak lemon drink

Step 1: Turn on your computer and log on to the internet.

Step 2: Go to www.worldcalledcatastrophe.blogspot.com

Step 3: Look for the picture of a flower.

Step 4: You must line up the web page so that the flower is roughly in the middle of your computer screen.

Step 5: Now take your hammer and hide.

Step 6: You can drink your weak lemon drink now.

Step 7: The bee will be lured to your computer by the pretty colours of the flower.

Step 8: When he lands on the flower you must strike with your hammer. If you do not have a hammer you can always use your fists.

Warning: This could lead to being stung and/or electrocuted. Fisting the bee could be harder than you might think.

Step 9: Congratulations! You have now killed your first bee. The correct way to dispose of the body is to roll it out of a convenient door.